Need a Black Best Friend?

Tired of being accused of racism? Want to stick it to random strangers online during arguments? Just want to get into the best parties in town?

Well, today’s your day.

Submit your application to join the Black Best Friend Program, and you may just be the lucky recipient of a Black Best Friend guaranteed to meet your specific needs.

By specific needs, we mean we just pull names out of a hat. Seriously. You don’t care. We know you don’t care. That’s what makes this so great. You get all the benefits of being seen as a modern, progressive person without actually having to waste time making friends outside of your comfort zone or zip code.

There are only so many Black Best Friends to go around, so hurry and submit your application today!

NEW! The Gay Best Friend Program!

Click here for a two-for-one coupon application!

A Black Best Friend AND a Gay Best Friend! You simply can’t lose with this deal.

Apply now!

B.

One thought to “Need a Black Best Friend?”

  1. This is exactly what I’ve been looking for! I’m always so jealous when I see people make comments online that would be considered extremely racist, but they obviously aren’t because they begin with “One of my best friends is black, so I’m not racist, but…..” I’m so excited to apply for this program!! Since I don’t know any colored folks (it’s not my fault, there are only 27 I work with and they all seem to avoid me) I’ve tried just starting off my completely not racists rants online with “I’m not racist, but…” and it just doesn’t have the same effect.

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